Ren: 'It wasn't David vs Goliath. It was a pendulum, eternally swaying from the dark to the light. The more intensely the light shone, the darker the shadow it cast. It was never really a battle for me to win, it was an eternal dance...'
That shadow can really drain your confidence but it's reassuring to realize that it's all part of the dance. Recent days have been characterized by challenges that I don't feel ready for. Then I face the challenges, because I have to. And it's awesome.
But then...it's like when Peter walked on water. I think - I'm doing it! I can do it! I'm so strong and confident. I'm relaxed and poised. But I'm not. I'm not there yet. And suddenly I'm really struggling again. I'm weak and overwhelmed....just like Peter began to sink.
I will not lose heart. My new self is strong and confident, and that strength and confidence grows out of my weakness.
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