It seems like just another day. It's groundhog day, except in this version things get worse every day. It's weird how things are always getting worse but it never reaches some really bad conclusion.
Rumination tells me it's hopeless. What difference does each of my daily goals make? How much progress can you make in a day? Anyway, what difference does it make? All of these goals - the whole lot of them - don't even make a dint in the problem.
But that's very circular. Rumination is telling me that about itself. Every day, as I actually do these things instead of just thinking about them, which is what allows rumination to define them, something is happening.
Rumination still dominates my mind. Like, as I'm writing this I'm thinking about it, and my thinking tells me that I'm defeated, that my daily goals don't make a difference. I live in this house of hopelessness and the walls are solid.
But every day I do my daily goals. I still don't get to all of them, but I do as many as I can, every single day.
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